I’ve lived a rather ruthless life, and in many instances it leads to me not having many friends. The reasoning being… I’m a bit too straight forward with my disappointments. I always felt that communication was key, and when someone would do or say something to or about me that I was displeased with, I made it known. Very rarely have I ever held anything in when it comes to something bothering me and usually if I do hold back, it is because I feel at that time I might not be in the proper frame of mind to really be able to put my frustration into words. Many people who are cast off by my extreme honesty are usually people that I don’t find myself seeing as a friend just for the fact that I can’t see me getting along with someone who doesn’t like me for who I am.
What is it that makes or breaks a good friendship? I would have to say it is the ability to communicate openly, be yourself with them, and being able to really connect on a level beyond casual conversation. If you can’t be open in your communications with someone then they aren’t going to listen to you when you have something important to say, and in most cases the people who don’t listen are only friends with you to use you. If you can’t be yourself, be it wacky and loud or shy and quiet, or somewhere in between… Well then they can’t accept you for you, and that kind of negativity tends to eat away at people. It can cause all kinds of problems in your personal interactions with others to the point where you find as an adult you don’t have any real friends you can count on. A good friendship is built on the ability to be able to talk without really talking. When you’ve hit that point with someone, where you can go spans of time without talking then pick up where you left off as if you’d never stopped, that is a true friend.
The key to remember is that it isn’t necessarily quantity of friends that makes a person happy, it is the quality of those friends that really enrich your life that makes for a great friendship. Those kinds of friendships last for years, and can make a big difference in a persons life. You don’t have to always agree on everything for the friendship to be great, but having ideas and things in common is always good. You should never feel that you can’t be open and honest with a friend, because that is what causes rifts between two people and can really damage an otherwise wonderful friendship.