Accident Prone Motherhood

Over the past couple days I’ve managed to pick up some unusual battle scars, either due to my own negligence or because my children decided I needed some color in my cheeks. (that is purely my assumption, as they aren’t fully capable of articulating structured sentences yet.) After thinking on it, I’ve decided that it was worth noting how damage prone I can be. After all, it is rather hilarious to tell and I can only assume it would be funny to read!

 

It all started Sunday morning. I had written something that actually alluded to today’s post, about how I cannot fathom doing anything prior to cleaning the dishes and sweeping the floors. Remember that? Yea, that was how it started.

 

I had been putting the plastic dishes away, their home being the cabinet below my microwave. As I had stood to get the pots and pans that belonged under the counter as well, I had seemingly forgotten that I had left the upper cabinets wide open. As I stood up quickly, propelling myself like a human rocket from a crouched position to standing, suddenly *WHAM* my skull collided with the corner edge of the open cabinet door. I still have a bump from it too! As soon as my head hit the edge, I knew I had done something dumb. Crying out in anguish and clutching my head while trying at the same time not to touch my head, I cried out in a pitiful voice, “Why can’t I have just one day?!” You see, I often hurt myself to varying degrees. I am what many consider to be accident prone. 

 

My husband, who was supposed to be asleep, came barreling down the stairs, jumped the baby gate nimble and quick, and was immediately there to aid me however I might need. My husband recognized the sound of my voice and how much misery I was in the instant it happened. He basically coddled me and cared for me and made me feel better all the while threatening to take me to the hospital if I didn’t feel better. I think it was just a ruse to make sure I did as he told me while my head was busy exploding.

 

 

Then there was yesterday. I’m not sure which is worse, hurting myself or my children hurting me! Most of yesterday morning was spent with children rolling around on me, heads colliding together at the worst possible times. More specifically, they continuously managed to hit my head where I had struck it just the day before. The most daring of the two had to of been my youngest. I should have known she had a wicked streak in her a mile long when she was the first to stab me in the head with her finger and go, “Boo boo.” Little did I know, she was bound to do something more amazing and magnificent to hurt mommy before solo play time yesterday.

 

As I was getting them cleaned from lunch and about to change my youngests bottom, she leapt forward and pounced on me, her two front teeth gashing a small beauty mark I have had in my upper right cheek for as long as I can remember. It swelled immediately. It swelled so bad that I could barely see out my right eye for the first half hour afterwards! After the initial shock of it died off, I resumed changing her and put them upstairs and laid an ice pack on it. It wasn’t until late last night I ventured a look in the mirror to see that I now have a black eye.

 

Thanks Celeste, mommy always wanted one of those!

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “Accident Prone Motherhood

  1. Very familiar story as recently I became so clumsy – the most traumatic was last August when i fell n the stairs at my house while shouting on my son 🙂 then i cut my knee against a handle of a forgotten open drawer plus some scratches and minor bruises 🙂 Nice to know that i am not alone!Good luck and take care!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Just wait sweetie..you will know you truly have talent when you walk outside to weed a garden and accidentally fall into the rosebush. then fall on a shovel when climbing out of the rosebush..then fall backwards into a cactus trying to get your face off the shovel.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s